Thursday, July 02, 2009
Blast from the Past
I have had history on the mind this week. Normally that is because I am reading a historical fiction book, but this time it is more recent than that - it is my own history. This isn't just a random thing, but rather than I was friended on Facebook by a person from my teenage years, and to be honest it has kind of spooked me a little.
I have no idea whether this person knows it or not, but he was my first love. Even if I had of found something about him on the net, I would have just read it, stored it away, but I never would have contacted him, so it is kind of strange that he contacted me. Over the years I have heard snippets about what he is up to because my mother sees him occasionally. That in itself really annoys me because she always tells me how well he has done for himself, but when we were going out, she did everything, and I mean everything she could to break us up, and said some truly horrible things about him. I had to think about whether I was going to accept or not, mainly because just the thought of seeing him again, or even just chatting to him, for the first time in 20 plus years freaks me out! This isn't about the possibility of something happening with him because he is married with kids, and lives in another city, but just running into him somewhere would see me running to hide pretty much. Part of that is because I am not proud of my appearance, but I am trying to do something about that now.
I know I am not alone in over thinking things like this. I'm not sure if it is because I have been by myself for so long now, or just because I am a girl, or because he was my first love, or what, but it seems that for the short term at least I will be revisiting my past, or at least the pleasant parts.